Homeless, so We're Living with the Shaffers

I love my in laws. For anyone to welcome our madness and to put their home/schedules not to mention having their furniture arranged in an airport fashion with couches back to back, because of storing our stuff, but making functional use of it while we are awaiting our flight to our new home destination. Papa, Shafe, is always going and cleaning. Check out the rims on our van this week for proof.He loves to joke around with his grandkids, just to see them smile and laugh with them. Nanna, who likes to sleep in, let's my kids come and crawl into her bed at 7:30 in the morning to watch cartoons with her, quality time with Nanna. She loves to read and I could get lost in her library, losing myself in her borrowed books.She is always making references to their service at the jail and has prompted the question/answer of:
 how is a prison like a temple?  
They're both places of hope and redemption, places of service and learning. I never thought that a prison could be considered a "Holy" place, but in hearing about their mission there and the stories of their branch President comparing the angel that visited Alma the younger and the sons of Mosiah to the angels who wore badges and carry guns who came to get theses sisters and take them to jail, as well as the stories of the sisters who find hope in the Gospel message of repentance and forgiveness.
I have learned to focus on what I can do while I am living here, always getting a "thank you" when I do the dishes, although I never am as effective as Shafe when it comes to loading the dishwasher to  ultimate full capacity and still get all the dishes clean.

Chistoso

Means funny in Spanish
Coleman got tired of sitting in church, wanted to play with a toy, and when he discovered that he forgot to bring one, decided to leave and go get one.When he got home, the doors were locked and Lex found him crying on the doorstep, "No one will let me in!They don't like me!"
I fear that I am more socially inept than ever. I cannot, nor do I wish to use my TBI as an excuse.The last time my older brother was in town he and his wife were asking me about how I was doing and they noticed the prism sticker on my glasses. In explaining to them I mentioned why the sticker was only on my left lens, not on both; my left eye makes up for the vision cut in the right, but I do not have a third eye to make it up for it in my left eye. Neal said, "Well that is dumb! why don't you grow another one?" I countered with, Why don't you grow some hair?! His wife laughed, so I thought I was safe.
While having Sunday dinner with the Baugh side of the family, my Uncle Mike told me that he thought of me while he was at the gym earlier in the week, when he put on something with the CHAMPION logo.
Abby is my cuddle bug and loves to come and crawl in bed with me, it stalls her from having to go to bed and gives her a bit longer to stretch and fully/properly wake up. I treasure these one-one moments with her. I get to tease her about any cute boys, or her latest Daughter of a DORK, she's my DD for short, moment(s). One morning her told me about her imaginary friend, Sophrina, who has long blond hair, is very good at math and has a list of favorite colors, surprisingly similar to hers.
At the first of the season, Jaylee's B-day swim party at Uncle Mike's, Matt and my Pa commented on how daredevish Maxwell has become, with him asking Matt to throw and flip him in the pool. I, of course took credit for the change, reminding them that I was home with him now and therefore he is under my continual careful care to do such things.
I come inside from a roll around the block to find Abby "brooming up" cereal spilled on the floor.

Maxwell fell asleep with me and woke himself up laughing by "fluffing," the word we use instead of "fart."
Max is figuring his world out, always asking questions like, "Dad, why do roadrunners not have brains? What is 23+52?
Matt and Jen gave me a tshirt with the word BAZINGA(inside joke for The Big Bang watchers) on the front and a yellow cap velcroed on the back. I especially like to wear it to therapy, where Mikey my therapist likes to come and hold the cape out while I walk around and any familyoutting, yesterday I accidentally tucked the cape into my pants after using the bathroom. While I was working up at KUED after my accident I would call Matt, who works across the golf/Frisbee golf course to come help make sure that I got my pants all the way over my left hip before leaving the bathroom, which was one of Lexy's concerns for me going back to work. One more wardrobe malfunction was that I put my t shirt that has DORK in bold red letters on the front on backwards while getting out of  Uncle Mike's pool, if only I could have claimed to have done it on purpose.
I am reading 'It is good to be alive.' by Jason Rushton. I had the upportunity of hearing him speak when he came and visited the rehab floor of the University of Utah while I was there. I love his sense of humor, on the inside of the bookcover is the expert from his book, "I always wanted to be the best at something and though that I could be the bestquadraplegic,but then Christopher Reeve broke his neck and I was competing with Superman!
On fathers day I was talking to my three kids and telling them that they are the best fathers day presents because they made me a father. Max piped up and said, "Abby and I made you a fatrher, Coleman made you a clown dad!" I am fine with that observation and am very much relieved that he didn't say a tyrant, which is what I feel that I have become at times as Mr. Mom.

Dead ends

There are no such thing as 'quick fixes'  or free passes' to life's problems. One example, with regards to relearning to walk I have had the opportunity, twice,  to attend an in-service by a company that provides a device that helps to stimulate muscles use through electric jolts, It brings new meaning to  shock therapy -the opening scene from Ghost Busters flashes in my mind. At both meeting/trial runs, the provider assured me that the device would be "very helpful for my recovery, but that there would still be a considerable amount of work on my end." In the end, I consulted with my Physical Therapists and came to the conclusion that for now this was not something to invest in. Not, because it was going to require some effort, but because the amount of electric charge it took to break up my klonis and muscle tension was not worth it, let alone the cost of the device.

Restlessness

I am prone to become this in my anticipation for the upcoming, next lesson to learn.Life is repeatedly teaching me to take a "What lack I yet?"approach, that Elder Worthin spoke on a few years ago, to the never ending lessons that present themselves to me.
I know that a "Change of heart" comes for me one cardiac muscle fiber at a time (see Alma 5:46)
I was astounded at my little brother's profoundness when I chatted with him about this uneasy feeling. my Kevy told me that Napoleon always would burn his ships, so that his army would know that there was no retreat option. Love you my Kevy. So, retreat isn't an option. Keep stumbling forward.

Moving explanation

We sold our house! It was listed for only 3 days. Lex and I are torn because we do not want to move, we love our neighbors and our home. We are dong it out of necessity, we only have one driver in the family & we need the kid’s school to be within walking distance.

One would think that selling it so soon would make it easier, but alas, I am a worrier. I made the comment to Lex that it was good to meet the family that bought our home, because they are going to get such a great neighborhood. She rolled her eyes and asked me, “Is that what you need to tell yourself in order to be alright with moving?” My answer is yes.

For FHE we went to Artic Circle to get some ice cream and wear out the kids, a double bonus, and happened to see one of our neighbors, Margaret Hall, there. She asked, as everyone who has seen this foreign looking lawn ornament that is on our lawn about us moving.Both Lex and I feel a need to let them know that it is out of a necessity-things that are not in our control that are the reasons behind our move. She was very polite and told us that she just hates moving, but wished us well.
So now the hunt is on while we are at Lexy's parents place until we find what we need. . . 
Have I mentioned one of my favorite quotes "the problem with praying for patience is that we want it right now!" 
Good things come to those who wait, I only say that now because my wait is over. I am excited to report that we have found a home! 735W. Morning Dew Dr.We are so excited to be close to family. Lex is already planning projects. Prayers are answered. We went over to check things out and our to be next door neighbor Kerm Mckay came over with tears in his eyes to give me a hug, he was so excited.

Confessions of an aspiring CHAMPION

I am more of a Pharisee  than a true CHAMPION, but I am a work in progress. I had a chat with Lex, the person who sees me on a daily basis, and at my best and worst. She mentioned that I know what to say, my strength and my weakness at times.

In the word’s of Shrek in SHREK the musical, “I guessed I’d be the hero . . . ”
In taking a deep breath and calming myself down, I reread how President Uchdorf  used the term," We all want to be respected and esteemed. We want to be champions. But we mortals do not become champions without effort and discipline or without making mistakes(You Can Do it Now, Oct. 2013)."I feel better about facing the right direction.

Is the rumor true? Moving explanation

We love our neighborhood, our home, and our ward family. Things have happened that were not in our control, I can no longer drive, Lexy's sister who lived by the charter school that they were going to is moving to Heber.
We are seeking the faith to do what we know is best for our family right now, to be closer to family and within walking distance from the kids school.Lex's mom keeps reminding me that we will get a "red light feeling" if we are not doing what our Heavenly Father wants us to do right now, so I'm hoping for that faith. We sold in three days and met the family that will live here. I am excited for them and know that they will be welcomed here.I even convinced my self that this move may be for them and their best. After all, the worth of a soul isn't measurable in His eyes. Lex and I are loved as perfectly as April and her family are by Him. I am not convinced that we are moving on to bigger and /or better, just that He is in charge and knows best and has always provided for us as we give our imperfect best.
Now look what you've done! turned on the water works and I don't know how the off switch works.

Reflection on speaking to a LDS mutual group on May 6th, 2014

We were asked to speak in the ward of one of Lexy’s friends about our story, they were doing a mutual night on the use of media and technology. Lexy did an amazing job,she was in her element speaking to the youth.  She let me go first and had reviewed her blog posts, from almost 4 years ago now, but got up without notes and explained her reality of life pre and post accident. She even had the participants try to put on a sock or jacket while using only one arm.

I felt flustered that I just read my talk and even lost my place a few times, but Lex reassured me that I did well. Before we spoke the Bishop of the ward shared his thoughts on the section of the Strength of Youth pamphlet that covers media use. He shared a clip from Elder Bednar speaking on the wonderful time that we live in and how marvelous it is to live in such a time where the Lord is hastening His work through the use of technology. I loved how he emphasized that in a coming day we will be encircled in His arms of love and that will be a real experience, not a virtual one.

This was my talk: August 1, 2010, started like any other Sunday, we went to our church meetings and then came home and were able to get a siesta in before we were to go to my parent’s home for Sunday dinner. Lex wasn’t feeling well, so I told her to rest at home while I took our two kids. It was a fun evening with my family. I was excited that my older brother and his family were in town and we stayed later than we normally would have. I remember the madness of getting everyone in our new pontiac G3 and with my families help, thankfully, we were all buckled in and headed on our way home to my wife.

I do not remember anything about the “bump,” as we like to call it with our kids. Abby, who was 4 remembers being held and comforted by a by stander while, I was being removed from the car. She remembers the girl who hit us crying and repeatedly telling us that she was sorry. Abby had a broken arm and Maxwell my then 2 year old had a concussion and bumps and bruises. They rode in the ambulance to Primary children’s hospital, while I was stabilized with a tracheotomy, so that I could breath and then was life flighted to the University of Utah. My wife can tell you of the goings on there because I was placed in a medically induced comma, my first memory coming to was my mother smiling down at me making vowel sounds. I looked at her and tried to say, " Hi mom."  I remember waking up and telling my twin brother that I missed him, pause, A LOTt! I had died and was in a place that looked like the ceiling room of the Salt Lake Temple where Lex and I were married. There was a group of friendly people, dressed in white telling me that I could choose to come with them to where the Celestial room was, where a great light was coming from. I remember feeling a great warmth and love that came from inside me when I thought about going with them, but I told them that I couldn’t, yet. I had to come back the way that I came to finish my life as a husband and father.

My rehab has been what the founder of Neuroworx Dale Hull, where I do PT, glacerly slow, I feel every millimeter of slow, and grating progress, while others see the big chunks fall off when I take a step or move my arm.I am learning to rejoice in the small and simple things, no more running over my youngest with my wheelchair while trying to change his diaper, yeah for potty training, getting to volunteer ever week in my Abby’s classroom, and even being able to breath by myself, eat food and drink, and use the bathroom without help. I enjoy reading with my kids or anything by Dan Brown or Gospel related. I am on a book exchange with my grandma. I love being outside rolls around my block or gardening in my raised gardening boxes that my local scout group custom made for me.

I have days that I wake up and I hurt, physically, mentally, emotionally, as well as spiritually. I ask why? And have always received a peaceful feeling of love in response. I know that we are all loved and that we are here to become like our Father in Heaven so that we can return and live with Him. I know that this is only possible because of the atonement of our Savior Jesus Christ. Pull over or use a hands free device if you need to use your phone and drive. Someone else’s life may depend on it.

Welcome back. . .

to the web log of a TBIer,(Traumatic Brain Injury) the only thing that is guaranteed here is inconsistency, repetition, and chaos, within an ongoing attempt to piece together my thoughts on life. Buckle up, and please have patience with me.  It's a crazy, yet CHAMPION ride.
In my adjustment to life's current therapy of moving. I am committing to a weekly post. Anything else is bonus, but that can change as quickly as the Spring weather does here in Utah, 82 one day and snow the next, but we cannot complain about getting water in any form when we live in a desert.

"You must be the change you seek for in the world"

-Ghandi    I came back to this life to do so, I want to be a father to my kids and a husband to my amazing wife. I am no where near perfect, but I am not about to let that stop me from trying my best to do what I can. I was contacted by the author behind this http://exitbytext.org/ Please check it out. I am excited that she would want me to participate in her life changing campaign.
My Grandma Baugh informed me that there is a new law in effect the 27th of May 2014 that outlaws the use of cell phones in a car in Utah without a hands free device.
Lex told me that at her work, Paradigm High School, the students participated in an assembly where the focus was impaired/distracted driving. The overall feeling that she got from them was that, "Their parents talk on their phones while diving, so why couldn't the do the same?"Lex tried to tell them that "we," their parents generation, don't know any better and that they could be a good example to their parents by not doing it and reminding them not too.