Monday, April 20, 2015

Fudge review

I've been meaning to gather some photos from our family blog to help me develop my Exit By Text presentations, but discovered that I didn't have access to it because I no longer have my KUED email. I came across a lot and had to take a break from it. I'm not sure that I'm ready emotionally to deal with all of it. I did come across the astounding strength of my wife Lexy. I love her and am grateful for her talent of love. It's healing me in so many ways. This is a post from her, 12 days after the accident:

Thursday 12th- Letter

Dear Curtis,

Today was a day of sitting and waiting and wondering. I held your hand and watched you trying so hard to tell me things through the one hand that is working. I had to turn away as I cried and hurt when I could not understand. As the sedation lessens and pain medications change, I watched you hurt and I watched you sleep and I watched you turn red with frustration. I watched your eyes sometimes be able to watch me and I felt you squeeze my hand so tight when you were in pain. I asked you not to be angry with me standing by while you worked so hard.

Today I talked about the things you said to me just 12 days ago. And sometimes, when I watched you open your eyes form those sedation-induced sleeps, I almost half expected you to say good morning, grab my hand, and walk right out of that room with me. I picked out new glasses that I hope you will like when you see them-- a late birthday present you meant to give me months ago but I never got around to ordering with you.

Today I want you to know that I love you. I love you, I love you. There are no other words, and yet they sound so trite. But I love you and would follow you off the edge of the world if I could be with you forever. I wish I could take this from you.

Today you signed "I love you" to me and my heart nearly fell on the floor. I wish you never had to suffer ever ever again. I think you've had enough.

Get better. Please get better.

Love always,

Friday, April 17, 2015

Neuroworx is CHAMPION

I love this place and am grateful for the hope that I continue to find here. I started in 2011 because of a referral from my sister-in-law and bother Kevin. I went three times a week.I started in their amazing aquatics therapy program and then graduated to land therapy and the Locomat.Check it out here. I feel like a celebrity knowing both Matt Carter and Dale Hull, two of the most CHAMPION people I've ever met. Jan still scares me a little. She has a sign at Neuroworx that should be bronzed in their new facility that reads:Beware Jan's on duty with a handicap symbol. Don't let my fear go to your head Jan. I currentlt go once a week, my therapy Thursday's with my Pa Baugh and am on a rotating schedule with the clinicians. My kind of CHAMPIONESS has yo be shared. Something about share the love and only take in doses, not all at once.

Thursday, April 16, 2015

What am I Worth?

I hope it’s more than my ability to hunt and peck type here. Is worth defined only by what we do?  I am working on being worthy enough to return to the temple, one of my new year’s goals. I just got back from volunteering in my Maxwell’s first grade classroom. I feel that our teachers are worth so much more than what they get paid, never mind that Lexy is a teacher. After my once a week, 4 hrs in the morning time in my kiddos’ classrooms, I text my sister Lacer and praise her for her work as an elementary teacher and then I take a nap because I am exhausted.
My Grandma Baugh and I love exchanging books, magazine articles, devotional thoughts, letters and emails. Recently we shared our concerns that we have in our individual spiritual progress. When I think of celestial material I think of her.  Here is one of the things that she's sent to me from Music and the Spoken Word :
                                            “Try Your Best”

No one ever does everything perfectly right all the time. Each of us makes mistakes and falls short

of perfection. That’s life, and that’s OK.

Broadway musical star Idina Menzel shared how she came to this realization. Recently, she wrote:

“There are about 3 million notes in a two-and-a-half-hour musical; being a perfectionist, it took me a

long time to realize that if I’m hitting 75 percent of them, I’m succeeding. . . . I am more than the

notes I hit, and that’s how I try to approach my life. You can’t get it all right all the time, but you can

try your best. If you’ve done that, all that’s left is to accept your shortcomings and have the courage

to try to overcome them.”1

It’s not that lofty goals, big plans, and high expectations are bad. We grow by stretching, by

courageously striving to achieve more than we previously thought possible. But growth also

requires patience and perspective. Sometimes we give up on ourselves too early, we start to define

ourselves by our mistakes, or we expect perfection and are therefore forever disappointed. When

this happens, we may need to ease up and simplify our lives.

For an overwhelmed college student, that meant lightening her schedule and her expectations a bit.

For a busy mother, it meant deciding to go a little easier on herself and her children. For all of us, it

can mean that we simply do our best - not someone else’s best.

We are all far more than the notes we hit - or fail to hit. Perhaps we should define ourselves not by

what we are today but by what we can be, by what we aspire to be. Wherever those aspirations are

leading us, let us accept that success can happen over time, little by little. With this perspective, our

mistakes and shortcomings can teach us instead of condemn us. In reality, this is what it means to

do our best.
Thank you my Grandma Baugh you are the BEST.

Wednesday, April 15, 2015

BE A CHAMPION neighbor, like mine, Kermit Mckay

He is my best friend's father. He was always in scouting with us growing up. Janet, his wife taught us piano. in fact my first thought when we moved next door was, now my kiddos will have the same piano teacher as I did. Unfortunately she does not teach anymore.
He was excited for us to be neighbors and his house has the same floor plan as us. He takes care of us by cutting and watering our lawn, putting out our garbage cans. Set up our springling system
A few months ago, I ran into him at church and he mentioned to me that he had experienced a panic attack, so he decided to fix our mailbox for us. I want to be like him, when I get scared, I want to be the kind of person who thinks of others and looks for an opportunity to serve them. He mentioned that his health hasn't always been good, but that he has been able to deal with everything, but was scared of these new mental symptoms of aging. I told him that if he ever needed someone to chat with, that he's welcome to stop by anytime. He smiled, thanked me and told me that he didn't know how I do it.
Just this week I ran into Janet fertilizing her front lawn, she was laughing and said, look what Kerm has me doing, Curtis! I smiled and took a better look at Kerm, who had his right arm in a sling. He told me that he fell in January. The next day he ran an errand for me and was over taking a look at my doorbell to fix it. He got emotional when he told me that the worst part of being injured was that he couldn't help me. He then told me how grateful he is for the health that he does have. Again, he looked at me and mentioned how he admired me.

Media fast

That's my excuse for not writing on here for a while. I was asked by my companion from Chile why I didn't have a Facebook account. I laughed and told him that I have a life with three kiddos. I get sucked in all to easily, but I have a TBI excuse for that one too.
So, if you are feeling media strained, take a break from the digitization. Life does go on without it. I am reading a book titled Improvised that was written by a friend in High school. She is a dance and takes a dancer view at the self-help industry. It is a refreshing take. Robin Koni you continue to amaze me. Thank you for your insight.
I was excited for this past General Conference, so much so that I woke up on Saturday at a quarter to 5. It was just like Christmas. I was grateful for the messages that were shared and the opportunity I have to study them more, I downloaded them onto my phone the Thursday after. Who would've dreamed that that would be possible?
Maxwell asked me for a gaming system this morning. I told him when he had enough money to buy one, he's welcome to get one. Not to be dismayed by me, he asked me what I had growing up? When I came up with things like Sega and Gameboy, he asked, what about a Wii? I feel old.
I watch BYUTV, because it is safe and I am old. I saw a BYU Devotional by Ryan Holmes about media. Check it out.

Friday, April 3, 2015

My President Pa Baugh

"You don't think that will go to his head?!" was what my younger brother, Kevin said when my Pa was made a member of our Stake Presidency. I love my Pa and we had a good laugh at his expence.  He gave me a tearful hug at the end of the meeting. I asked him if I needed to repent for giving such a hard time or if I need to give him a worse time now? He smiled at me and replied with tears still in his eyes, but smiling, that I better give him a worse time. You see, my Pa did not and doesn't aspire to be a leader, but he does love people and loves to teach them. I love his example.