Saturday, January 24, 2015
My Pa signed me up for Brain HQ and I've been on that once a month for a half a year. I just recently discovered Luminosity, which is a free sight, and have got hooked and play against my kiddos. I was frustrated that My Abbyster was beating me. My Maxwell heard me and got serious, having me look in his eyes as he reminded me, " you were in a car accident and have had some short-term memory loss." Who is the parent in this scenario?
Monday, January 19, 2015
Saturday, January 10, 2015
Lex noticed a more laxidasical attitude that I had about things. I thought that this was like Maxwell and him being exhausted from the change of being at school all day, getting home and being completely unreasonable because of it. I was exhausted from the mental effort of walking all day. She was worried that it was more than that and that I should talk to my rehab Dr. about possibly going off my "chill-pill "which I did. Thanks to getting off of it and to my "light therapy," I am on an upswing. I think that a vacation with the family to the Magical Kingdom may have had a part in the upswing too. I know that the mundane wears on me, grinding away at my sense of purpose. My Bishop still comes over once a week to check on me and to get tutored in Spanish. I am grateful that he gives me a chance to serve him.He told me that while he was listening to the radio, to a motivational speaker, the comment was made that the two most important days of your life are, first the day that you were born and second, the day that you find out why you were born. I have the unique experience to have had the chance to choose to come back to this life. I know that I am here for a reason and am daunted at my imperfections and weaknesses. Not many people have second chances in life. I'm excited to continue to uncover joy in the Journey, as iI'm a work in progress, just like all of us are.
I am currently reading a book that was given to me for Christmas, Am I a Saint, Yet? It is all about overcoming perfectionism. The first technique talked about has you journal your thoughts to help you become more self-aware of the negative self-talk that holds you back and strangles the life out of best, yet imperfect attempts at anything. I was shocked to see how unrelentingly cruel I am to myself.
"I need more help than you can offer" is my usual response to my Abby girl who is always looking to help her CHAMPION of a Dork dad.
My Pa keeps reminding me that although my situation is a bit on the extreme side, I am not alone, that my problems are just like everyone else's, in that we all have problems. This leads to on of his favorite sayings, "Life is exchanging one set of problems for another." One of Lex's hopes as a parent is to instill in our children are that they are problem-solvers. As a mentor she sees first hand both sides of the spectrum of young adults who, on one side are avoiders or in denial to the other side of taking on everyone's problems.
Tuesday, January 6, 2015
It was one of the books that became my gift of choice to others this year at Christmas. Nerdy, giving a book, but I loved the books that I got this year.
I saw my therapist Dr. Jeff Robinson a few months ago and he gave me a calendar to chart my prayers, scripture reading, meditation, and visualizations of success. For the last one he used the story of a client who had a paper route and would say to himself, "Not in the bushes, not in the bushes!" and guess where he would end upthrowing the newspaper when he would say that to himself? it would go right into the bushes. I need to meditate and visualize my success. I watched a news story on the power of meditation. the report was on a school in California that had tried everything to help their students, but only found success, and were amazed at the impact, when they implemented having their students have 2 15mins of quiet time during the school day. The teachers thought that it was a joke at first. ready, (No joke) clear your mind and breath with me.
Sunday, January 4, 2015
Theme of trip:
Importance to remember I have a habit of getting trapped into thinking that my now is the only thing that exists, sometimes this is a good thing, very Zen-like. way to live, but other times the pendulum swings to a bogged down despair. I thought as I was enjoying my vacation with my family, if only I can keep all of this in my memory to be able to use in those times of despair and drudgery in the mundane, things would work out for me.Matt ad I were talking about how, now that we're home, it all seems like a dream
Survive and not go over a curb in my wheelchair, Just as important and contributing to my survival,not to ride I't a small World.
2.Darth Vader on the dumbo ride
3. The Dopey in you brings out the Grumpy in me
Transfer on STAR TOURS with Dr. Neal & cars with Pa
Loosing Jammin Jay at the airport
My Lacer, who is a 3rd grade teacher couldn't let it go, of all her teacher genes even while on vacation Now boys & girls!
Also from my Lacer,"No one wants to ride with me!"
Max after the longest line that we waited in for the Peterpan ride said, "That was it?!"
Coleman riding the buzzlight year ride and spinning grandma.
Shannon telling Kevin and Heather not to takeout on the Indianna Jones ride. Me telling Jake thanks for not making out with me. Him not wanting to respond with "my pleasure."
Pa sitting and eating lunch by himself. He just needs some time alone.
Amers and I teasing each other about who's waiting for who.
Coleman waking up the first night, running out in the morning looking for Max and Abby and me yelling for Abby to help me find him, but she was with grandma and grandpa.
My Pa,:Disneyland is the only place that's the happiest place on earth that you can go to hell too."
Maxwell fighting Darth Vader made the whole trip worth it:
Thursday, January 1, 2015
My home is still wheelchair free. I do bring a kitchen chair over to load/unload the dishwasher and am working on bending over to pick things up,walking without a cane, and overall balance at therapy at Neuroworx.
I am excited about my progress. I still use my wheelchair at church and at the kids school. So, that's twice a week. It is interesting to me that when I sit down in it, it feels foreign. I never thought that would ever happen.CHAMPION indeedy.
In my getting around my home, I've found that if I can get my feet to point in the right direction before I start walking, I have more success with my balance."Start at the very begining" Curtis, "A very good place to start." I try to make my Saturdays, steppin' Saturdays and not use my cane.
I was excited to see my older brother and his family over the Christmas break. Last year. I cannot believe how much their 5 kids grow in six to eight months, we usually see them for Christmas and in the Summer. Shannon, my sister in law is always so kind to tell me about the progress she sees in me. It's hard for me to see my progress as I have "pie in the sky" hopes and goals, that coupled with my all or nothing thinking and i'm prone to discouragement.
1. I want to walk to my parent's home from my house.
2. get back to the temple
3. start public speaking about distracted driving
4. have a "wheelchair free" year, my thought with my yellow beauty was "Disneyland or bust" and I went twice with it.