Monday, December 29, 2014
Light therapy
I have complained to my Neuro/rehab doctor, Dr. Speed for as long as I can remember about my loss of energy and depression, step one is recognition, check. When I met with him in August he recommended that I get a light box and give it a try, my parents had changed the light bulbs above their kitchen island and thought it had helped them and my brother in-law had seen them used in the office when they were back in Chicago. I got one and use it in the mornings when I get dressed and am excited to say that It works for me. I like to leave it on as I study my scriptures and fill my lamp spiritually for the day. I know that our Savior Jesus Christ is the light that will help us find our way. I love Him and am grateful for this physical reminder of my dependence on Him.
Saturday, December 13, 2014
"Some Miracles Take Time"
By Art E. Berg was given to me by my good friend Ellis Christensen and recommended to me by my other good friend and former Bishop Nathan Hanson. I savored this book for about a month and a half, thinking the whole time that my story had been told by Art. I got really excited to learn of his CHAMPION moments, as well as his "Goliaths"or in my terminology Everests to overcome. He is one of my CHAMPION heroes, you never have to look far to find one. I was eager to contact him, so much so that I tried calling the number listed on the inside of his book cover several times to the current holder of the number's annoyance and wrote him a letter to the address listed there as well.Yesterday, I wised up a bit, something about this TBI make me in need of some extra time, I finally Googled him to find out that he passed away in 2002. Sad for me and his friends and family, but not for him. What did we do before Google? Lesson learned, I hope, before getting all excited to one day shake some one's hand to tell them. "thank you," do your homework to make sure that they are still around.
I have a thing with time, to explain I will go back to sixth grade, I was 11 years old and in Mrs. Renz's class at Horizon elementary. We did a getting to know yow worksheet to get us all flying together in a "V" formation for our year long learning adventure, like swans. her, mrs. Renz's, imagery not mine, but I loved it and my time in her class. One of the questions was fill in the blank: "I am most afraid of . . ." I remember explaining my answer of "time" because I never had enough of it when you wanted more, but there was too much of it when you were waiting for something. Prone to/addicted to worry here, unfortunately it can be passed on, my sweet Abby worries about everything and anything.
A few highlights, from the introduction Art quotes Elder Boyd K. Packer, "Some people think a miracle is only a miracle if it happens instantaneously, but miracles can grow slowly and patience and faith can compel things to happen that otherwise never would have come to pass." and Spencer W. Kimball stated, "there are infinitely more miracles today than in any age past." That is followed by this poem by Grace Troy:"
I have a thing with time, to explain I will go back to sixth grade, I was 11 years old and in Mrs. Renz's class at Horizon elementary. We did a getting to know yow worksheet to get us all flying together in a "V" formation for our year long learning adventure, like swans. her, mrs. Renz's, imagery not mine, but I loved it and my time in her class. One of the questions was fill in the blank: "I am most afraid of . . ." I remember explaining my answer of "time" because I never had enough of it when you wanted more, but there was too much of it when you were waiting for something. Prone to/addicted to worry here, unfortunately it can be passed on, my sweet Abby worries about everything and anything.
A few highlights, from the introduction Art quotes Elder Boyd K. Packer, "Some people think a miracle is only a miracle if it happens instantaneously, but miracles can grow slowly and patience and faith can compel things to happen that otherwise never would have come to pass." and Spencer W. Kimball stated, "there are infinitely more miracles today than in any age past." That is followed by this poem by Grace Troy:"
I know not why His hand is laid In chastening on my life,
Nor why it is my little world Is filled so full of strife;
I know not why when faith looks up And seeks for rest from pain,
That o'er my sky fresh clouds arise And drench my path with rain.
I know not why my prayer so long By Him has been denied; Nor why, while other's ships sail on, Mine should in port abide.
But I do know that God is love, That He my burden shares, And though I may not understand I know for me He cares. I know the heights for which I long Are often reached through pain, I know the sheaves must needs be threshed To yield the golden grain. 'Tis that I thus may learn to love And know as I am known, I will not care how rough the road That leads me to my home."
That is just the beginning.I found myself relating to this book in ways that I never imagined possible.
Nor why it is my little world Is filled so full of strife;
I know not why when faith looks up And seeks for rest from pain,
That o'er my sky fresh clouds arise And drench my path with rain.
I know not why my prayer so long By Him has been denied; Nor why, while other's ships sail on, Mine should in port abide.
But I do know that God is love, That He my burden shares, And though I may not understand I know for me He cares. I know the heights for which I long Are often reached through pain, I know the sheaves must needs be threshed To yield the golden grain. 'Tis that I thus may learn to love And know as I am known, I will not care how rough the road That leads me to my home."
That is just the beginning.I found myself relating to this book in ways that I never imagined possible.
Monday, December 8, 2014
Put the "Learning" back into the curve.
I get into funks, like everyone else. My most recent funk has been a bit of a stalling out, I feel some-what stuck, the thought keeps running through my head that I am finally getting caught up, or getting a handle on things and then I notice that I failed to look all the way to my left and there are a million other things that I need to be doing, such is life.
I am excited for any progress at all. I chatted with my Neuro-doctor about how the closer I get in my recovery to pre-TBI Curtis activity, the more I am prone to make the comparison. He told me that I was not being fair with myself to make the comparison.
So, welcome to my new, post TBI life:
a "wheelchair-free" home, volunteering at Abby and Max's school every Tuesday mornings until lunch time. Thank you Nanna, Lexy's mom for taking Coleman so that I can do this. I love being in the classroom to be involved in my kiddos' education.
taking Coleman to preschool with my sister Amers three times a week. She likes me, I'm not sure what's wrong with her, but I'm glad that she does. We still treat ourselves to a slurpee a week.
I love to read in my down time. I still love being on a book exchange with my Grandma Baugh. I always have Lex reading something for school, it's a CHAMPION challenge to try and keep up with her.
Life is all about curves, it isn't a matter of "if," but of "When"
I am excited for any progress at all. I chatted with my Neuro-doctor about how the closer I get in my recovery to pre-TBI Curtis activity, the more I am prone to make the comparison. He told me that I was not being fair with myself to make the comparison.
So, welcome to my new, post TBI life:
a "wheelchair-free" home, volunteering at Abby and Max's school every Tuesday mornings until lunch time. Thank you Nanna, Lexy's mom for taking Coleman so that I can do this. I love being in the classroom to be involved in my kiddos' education.
taking Coleman to preschool with my sister Amers three times a week. She likes me, I'm not sure what's wrong with her, but I'm glad that she does. We still treat ourselves to a slurpee a week.
I love to read in my down time. I still love being on a book exchange with my Grandma Baugh. I always have Lex reading something for school, it's a CHAMPION challenge to try and keep up with her.
Life is all about curves, it isn't a matter of "if," but of "When"
Saturday, November 29, 2014
My CHAMPION Inspiration
http://www.kutv.com/features/features/inside-the-story/stories/Inside-The-Story-A-Walking-Quadriplegic-22161.shtml#.VHK7HIVdo9R
I know this guy and love him. Thank you Dale Hull for being who you are, you're CHAMPION in my book. I am amazed at your ability to take a negative event in your life and make it into something not only positive for yourself, but to reach out and to help so many others do the same thing.
I know this guy and love him. Thank you Dale Hull for being who you are, you're CHAMPION in my book. I am amazed at your ability to take a negative event in your life and make it into something not only positive for yourself, but to reach out and to help so many others do the same thing.
Saturday, November 15, 2014
Hysteria
I found this app evernote about a year ago, or so. It helps me to keep track of all the things that I want to write about here. Here is my list of hysterical thing that have happend:
I'm still making some great progress at Neuroworx every Thursday with Mikey. I was working with him on kneeling and supporting myself in a 'quad' position with my hands and arms on the ground as Lance was also helping to give support for me to engage my left side, when Lance said. "That is all you Curtis,. . . ALMOST!" Thanks Lance, don't sugar coat things for me, I can take it. I remember trying the same exercise when I first started at Neuroworx and I wasn't anywhere close to" ALMOST." Another on of my mantras is, "slow and steady wins the race."(Sherlock Holmes Game of Shadows)
One of my finer parenting moments: I am sitting on the couch at my in-laws with Coleman when he gets in a fight with one of his cousins and puts him in a headlock. To get Coleman off his cousin, I get Coleman in a headlock. Thankfully Aunty Em saw that I had just lost it and came over to talk to Coleman.
I'm still making some great progress at Neuroworx every Thursday with Mikey. I was working with him on kneeling and supporting myself in a 'quad' position with my hands and arms on the ground as Lance was also helping to give support for me to engage my left side, when Lance said. "That is all you Curtis,. . . ALMOST!" Thanks Lance, don't sugar coat things for me, I can take it. I remember trying the same exercise when I first started at Neuroworx and I wasn't anywhere close to" ALMOST." Another on of my mantras is, "slow and steady wins the race."(Sherlock Holmes Game of Shadows)
One of my finer parenting moments: I am sitting on the couch at my in-laws with Coleman when he gets in a fight with one of his cousins and puts him in a headlock. To get Coleman off his cousin, I get Coleman in a headlock. Thankfully Aunty Em saw that I had just lost it and came over to talk to Coleman.
I have been going to institute class with my mom and dad on Thursday nights, yes, Thursdays are full days for me, with Neuroworx in the morning and institute class at night. Last week we were talking about how the Old Testiment prophet, Ezekiel was commanded to not only testify, but to act out the prophecies that the Lord gave to him. Pa and I were giggling in class together as we read about his plight, I hope that it is alright to say that you were giggling with me my Pa.Men still giggle, right?
Mikey at Neuroworx dressed up as Batman nwearing an aextra large 'onesy' for his Halloween costume, When he was asked what he was for Halloween he replied, "I ate him(Batman) and stole his clothes."
In view of my last post, "Too Chill" I've been reminiscing about my medication hiccups, I worked with Matt Carter, a new hire at Neuroworx, a few weeks ago, he noticed that my tone was worse than normal. He asked if I took anything to help with it. I explained to him that I was originally on a medication that had the rare side effect of urinary retention AND urgency. It was hell for me. Lex called my Dr. and got the nurse on call for superscription refills, who told her that those were really rare side effects and I shouldn't just stop taking it. Lex told him that I was an adult who had a choice to refuse treatment. I am on another muscle relaxant that I take once a night and haven't had any adverse reactions or side effects yet. Again, a trial and error thing.
In view of my last post, "Too Chill" I've been reminiscing about my medication hiccups, I worked with Matt Carter, a new hire at Neuroworx, a few weeks ago, he noticed that my tone was worse than normal. He asked if I took anything to help with it. I explained to him that I was originally on a medication that had the rare side effect of urinary retention AND urgency. It was hell for me. Lex called my Dr. and got the nurse on call for superscription refills, who told her that those were really rare side effects and I shouldn't just stop taking it. Lex told him that I was an adult who had a choice to refuse treatment. I am on another muscle relaxant that I take once a night and haven't had any adverse reactions or side effects yet. Again, a trial and error thing.
I took up meditation right before the accident, in hide-sight, this was yet another tender mercy. I checked out a book from the library that lead me through a nature-walk to get my mind calm, it used numbers with a visualizations, like, " One . . .fun" they rhyme, so I even I can remember them. I remember in the hospital using this, nonstop. Once when I had to do a body-scan and drink this radioactive dye for the test, I got to "three. . .tree" and thought of Max climbing a tree, which made me think like my Maxwell and rhyme "pee" with three and tree and then I couldn't do the test because I had to stop drinking and pee.
Speaking of Max, my kiddos get on movie kicks, I try to regulate and sneak in a PBS educational program as often as possible, such as 'Magic School Bus.' A few weeks ago they got stuck watching Disney's "Hercules" over and over again. We got it at the library on DVD, we had it on VHS, but are still not sure where all of our things are, ahh the joys of moving, anywho my point is that my kids have seen it before, but it has been a few years, it was fun to see them experience it differently, Maxwell especially thought it was funny, with fits of laughter at anything remotely funny.
I love living in Murray. I miss our neighbors in West Jordan yes, but living close to my sister Amy is better than I ever could have imagined. She helps take Coleman to preschool three times a week, since her oldest, Jaylee, is in the same class.I get to go with her to drop them off, which takes us conveniently by a 7-11. Amy has two addictions, that I know of, cheesedogs and slurpees. We try to be good and only treat ourselves to slurpees on Mondays. Who doesn't need a pick me up on Mondays? But if one of us isn't feeling well, we are both, sympathetically, pulled into helping the other person out by treating them to a slurpee. How can you say no to a slurpee? You cannot have a bad day with one. We also enjoy texting one another, just as long as neither of us are driving while we are texting. I like to refer to our texting back and for as a " texathon." It usually includes a series of texts trying to one up the other person in funniness. CHAMPION times.
I love living in Murray. I miss our neighbors in West Jordan yes, but living close to my sister Amy is better than I ever could have imagined. She helps take Coleman to preschool three times a week, since her oldest, Jaylee, is in the same class.I get to go with her to drop them off, which takes us conveniently by a 7-11. Amy has two addictions, that I know of, cheesedogs and slurpees. We try to be good and only treat ourselves to slurpees on Mondays. Who doesn't need a pick me up on Mondays? But if one of us isn't feeling well, we are both, sympathetically, pulled into helping the other person out by treating them to a slurpee. How can you say no to a slurpee? You cannot have a bad day with one. We also enjoy texting one another, just as long as neither of us are driving while we are texting. I like to refer to our texting back and for as a " texathon." It usually includes a series of texts trying to one up the other person in funniness. CHAMPION times.
I get sympathy where ever I go, I constantly remind myself that to people who don't know me, I am that person you see and wonder what happend to them and are immediately grateful for everything you do have. My most recent outting was last night at Murray High School's Sound of Music production, but it happens even at home. Lex was standing by the fridge and I went to put something in it and was caught off balance without my cane. I looked over at Lex and she was leaning with me in the direction that I needed to go to get myself back in balance.
Our Kids have picked up on being home with Mr. Mom, becoming pranksters, just like their dad. One morning I got up and went to get dressed in our spare room, where I have taken over the closet and found a Hippo sticker placed on my sock bin to scare me. My kids know that I am afraid of Hippos because one pooped on me when I was a kid at the zoo.They all came in giggling and asking me if they had scared me.
I love reading with my kiddos.I learned through my work at KUED that the number one thing you can do to help your kids read is read yourself. Yet another excuse to be reading my life away in five books right now. I feel like I missed part of the process in teaching Abby to read and am excited to be here to help coach Max. Our favorites are:Awesome Man, Super Heroes, I Love My Hat,& Memoirs of a Gold Fish. But don't take my word for it, check them out at your local library and see for yourself, thanks again for my work at KUED, a local PBS station and Lavar on Reading Rainbow
We went a few months ago to the Ogden City Temple Open House with my side of the family We stopped at Cick-Fil-A to grab some lunch and Amy, in her Sunday best sat down next to her youngest, Emery, after getting them all their food, only to find that she sat down on the sauce packetthat Emery had moved from the table to the bench.It is only funny because it happened to you Amers and you could laugh about it
Our new home has a wood burning fireplace and chimney. At the beginning of Fall, a bird flew down it and came out in our living room one Saturday morning. Lex got attacked by the confused 'Santa Claus 'bird.She tried to get it out our front door with a broom, but it wouldn't go near her. I finally had her stand in the hall way with the broom, so that it wouldn't get trapped in one of our rooms, and left the front door open.Abby came running upstairs crying because Mom was screaming. Fun times at the Baugh home.
We went and saw RIO2 at the end of summer this year and fell in love with the Gabby character because she reminds us of Abby and all of her theatrics. We still love watching it and repeating lines that she says, Wait for me. . . Don't leave me!"
I am sarcastic, that already been a blog post. At Neuroworx, working with Mikey to tells me that I am tight, to which I replied, "tell me something that I don't know."Justin, another therapist friend of mine hears me say this and replies, "Some turtles breath through their butts!" Note to self be careful what you ask for. Who knew?!
I mentioned that in moving we've misplaced somethings, but we have also found things that we have always had, but forgot about them. One of these thing are our movies.Max, Coleman, & Abby were watching Nemo and talking about what they liked about it. It was funny to hear them talk and ask if they really had beeneaten by a whale, they understood that the whale wasn't eating them, but that Dorey and Martin were just trapped in its mouth. Maxwell was adimate that the crabs were crabs and not spiders, I think he was trying to convince himself more than the rest of us.
I mentioned my sister Amy's two addictions, that I know of. She, the lucky sister who not only lives close to me, but right next door to our mom and dad. So when my parents need help, guess who gets to be their number one go to person, that's right my lucky Amers She gets to not only help me with Coleman and getting him to preschool, but also is the fall back if there is a conflict with my Pa taking me to therapy. On one such occation, I tried to make it more worth her time by paying for a cheesedog on our way home. We got one for .Jaylee too and as she was eating her cheesedog, she broke down because of the bread around the cheese, and it was hot. Amers lovingly bit the top off to let it cool down. I would've just eaten my kids, if there was any complaint from them.
I told Coleman about going to therapy with Grandpa on Thursday when it was a Wednesday thinking that he would be excited, he looked at me and said, "no I want to go to school."Oh well, for getting excited to be with my Pa. Sorry Grandpa, but school won this time.
ColeAmers came to pick up Coleman for preschool one day and brought a Minnie Mouse carseat for him to sit on. Coleman just sat on the lawn, he wouldn't get in the car. When Amy opend the door to let him in she had tried to angle the seat so that he wouldn't notice it, but Jaylee announced to him that "he was lucky to get to sit in the Minnie Mouse seat today!"Nice try my Amers. She tried to tell him that it was no big deal, "No one would even see him on it." Coleman didn't care who saw him, he knew he was sitting on it.
We are starting a new tradition of watching the Priesthood session at Pa's house and eating buffalo burgers before. The MTC missionaries singing and Kevy felt sorry for them,saying, "they don't know what they're in for!" Matthew responded that Kevy will be a good mission president someday, telling the his missionaries, "This sucks, but it gets better, if you can do this you can do anything."
We went a few months ago to the Ogden City Temple Open House with my side of the family We stopped at Cick-Fil-A to grab some lunch and Amy, in her Sunday best sat down next to her youngest, Emery, after getting them all their food, only to find that she sat down on the sauce packetthat Emery had moved from the table to the bench.It is only funny because it happened to you Amers and you could laugh about it
Our new home has a wood burning fireplace and chimney. At the beginning of Fall, a bird flew down it and came out in our living room one Saturday morning. Lex got attacked by the confused 'Santa Claus 'bird.She tried to get it out our front door with a broom, but it wouldn't go near her. I finally had her stand in the hall way with the broom, so that it wouldn't get trapped in one of our rooms, and left the front door open.Abby came running upstairs crying because Mom was screaming. Fun times at the Baugh home.
We went and saw RIO2 at the end of summer this year and fell in love with the Gabby character because she reminds us of Abby and all of her theatrics. We still love watching it and repeating lines that she says, Wait for me. . . Don't leave me!"
I am sarcastic, that already been a blog post. At Neuroworx, working with Mikey to tells me that I am tight, to which I replied, "tell me something that I don't know."Justin, another therapist friend of mine hears me say this and replies, "Some turtles breath through their butts!" Note to self be careful what you ask for. Who knew?!
I mentioned that in moving we've misplaced somethings, but we have also found things that we have always had, but forgot about them. One of these thing are our movies.Max, Coleman, & Abby were watching Nemo and talking about what they liked about it. It was funny to hear them talk and ask if they really had beeneaten by a whale, they understood that the whale wasn't eating them, but that Dorey and Martin were just trapped in its mouth. Maxwell was adimate that the crabs were crabs and not spiders, I think he was trying to convince himself more than the rest of us.
I mentioned my sister Amy's two addictions, that I know of. She, the lucky sister who not only lives close to me, but right next door to our mom and dad. So when my parents need help, guess who gets to be their number one go to person, that's right my lucky Amers She gets to not only help me with Coleman and getting him to preschool, but also is the fall back if there is a conflict with my Pa taking me to therapy. On one such occation, I tried to make it more worth her time by paying for a cheesedog on our way home. We got one for .Jaylee too and as she was eating her cheesedog, she broke down because of the bread around the cheese, and it was hot. Amers lovingly bit the top off to let it cool down. I would've just eaten my kids, if there was any complaint from them.
I told Coleman about going to therapy with Grandpa on Thursday when it was a Wednesday thinking that he would be excited, he looked at me and said, "no I want to go to school."Oh well, for getting excited to be with my Pa. Sorry Grandpa, but school won this time.
ColeAmers came to pick up Coleman for preschool one day and brought a Minnie Mouse carseat for him to sit on. Coleman just sat on the lawn, he wouldn't get in the car. When Amy opend the door to let him in she had tried to angle the seat so that he wouldn't notice it, but Jaylee announced to him that "he was lucky to get to sit in the Minnie Mouse seat today!"Nice try my Amers. She tried to tell him that it was no big deal, "No one would even see him on it." Coleman didn't care who saw him, he knew he was sitting on it.
We are starting a new tradition of watching the Priesthood session at Pa's house and eating buffalo burgers before. The MTC missionaries singing and Kevy felt sorry for them,saying, "they don't know what they're in for!" Matthew responded that Kevy will be a good mission president someday, telling the his missionaries, "This sucks, but it gets better, if you can do this you can do anything."
Tuesday, November 4, 2014
Too chill
That is what my chill pill makes me. I started taking a medication that my neuro-doctor recommended because I mentioned that I had noticed a change in my ability to I get in control of my frustrations. I've been the calm and collected one in our parenting with our kiddos and I found myself post-TBI with a shortened fuse, so to speak. I would fly into a rage, but on the meds, the pendulum was swung to the other side. I found myself in an avoidance state of mind and being, instead of engaging in life.
Thanks to my Lex who calls me out on this behavior and lovingly problem shoots with me. I have learned, by life experience to take it every other day, but am currently off of it all together. Somethings in life you just learn by trial and error.
So I am off it now. Here we go, I am no longer heavily medicated for your safety. I do remember a time when I would wake up to pain and immediately take pain meds to be able to catch my breath. I am glad to be alive and progressing, even if that makes it hit or miss posting on here.
Thanks to my Lex who calls me out on this behavior and lovingly problem shoots with me. I have learned, by life experience to take it every other day, but am currently off of it all together. Somethings in life you just learn by trial and error.
So I am off it now. Here we go, I am no longer heavily medicated for your safety. I do remember a time when I would wake up to pain and immediately take pain meds to be able to catch my breath. I am glad to be alive and progressing, even if that makes it hit or miss posting on here.
Friday, October 24, 2014
10 Mins of fame
I was asked by the creator of exit by texts to share my experience on KSL's Spanish program.Here is the link:
https://www.ksl.com/index.php?nid=1219&sid=31979168&title=mis-noticias-16-de-octubre
https://www.ksl.com/index.php?nid=1219&sid=31979168&title=mis-noticias-16-de-octubre
Monday, September 29, 2014
His Grace is Sufficient
My Pa gave me a copy of this talk and I wanted to share it here. When I read it I asked myself why I hadn't heard of this before Here is the link that I pulled this off of:
. http://speeches.byu.edu/?act=viewitem&id=1966
Brad Wilcox was serving as a member of the Sunday School General Board of The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints as well as a BYU associate professor in the Department of Teacher Education in the David O. McKay School of Education when this devotional address was given on 12 July 2011.
I am grateful to be here with my wife, Debi, and my two youngest children—who are currently attending BYU—and several other family members who have come to be with us.
It is an honor to be invited to speak to you today. Several years ago I received an invitation to speak at Women’s Conference. When I told my wife, she asked, “What have they asked you to speak on?”
I was so excited that I got my words mixed up and said, “They want me to speak about changing strengths into weaknesses.”
She thought for a minute and said, “Well, they’ve got the right man for the job!”
She’s correct about that. I could give a whale of a talk on that subject, but I think today I had better go back to the original topic and speak about changing weaknesses into strengths and about how the grace of Jesus Christ is sufficient (see Ether 12:27, D&C 17:8, 2 Corinthians 12:9)—sufficient to cover us, sufficient to transform us, and sufficient to help us as long as that transformation process takes.
Christ’s Grace Is Sufficient to Cover Us
A BYU student once came to me and asked if we could talk. I said, “Of course. How can I help you?”
She said, “I just don’t get grace.”
I responded, “What is it that you don’t understand?”
She said, “I know I need to do my best and then Jesus does the rest, but I can’t even do my best.”
She then went on to tell me all the things she should be doing because she’s a Mormon that she wasn’t doing.
She continued, “I know that I have to do my part and then Jesus makes up the difference and fills the gap that stands between my part and perfection. But who fills the gap that stands between where I am now and my part?”
She then went on to tell me all the things that she shouldn’t be doing because she’s a Mormon, but she was doing them anyway.
Finally I said, “Jesus doesn’t make up the difference. Jesus makes all the difference. Grace is not about filling gaps. It is about filling us.”
Seeing that she was still confused, I took a piece of paper and drew two dots—one at the top representing God and one at the bottom representing us. I then said, “Go ahead. Draw the line. How much is our part? How much is Christ’s part?”
She went right to the center of the page and began to draw a line. Then, considering what we had been speaking about, she went to the bottom of the page and drew a line just above the bottom dot.
I said, “Wrong.”
She said, “I knew it was higher. I should have just drawn it, because I knew it.”
I said, “No. The truth is, there is no line. Jesus filled the whole space. He paid our debt in full. He didn’t pay it all except for a few coins. He paid it all. It is finished.”
She said, “Right! Like I don’t have to do anything?”
“Oh no,” I said, “you have plenty to do, but it is not to fill that gap. We will all be resurrected. We will all go back to God’s presence. What is left to be determined by our obedience is what kind of body we plan on being resurrected with and how comfortable we plan to be in God’s presence and how long we plan to stay there.”
Christ asks us to show faith in Him, repent, make and keep covenants, receive the Holy Ghost, and endure to the end. By complying, we are not paying the demands of justice—not even the smallest part. Instead, we are showing appreciation for what Jesus Christ did by using it to live a life like His. Justice requires immediate perfection or a punishment when we fall short. Because Jesus took that punishment, He can offer us the chance for ultimate perfection (see Matthew 5:48, 3 Nephi 12:48) and help us reach that goal. He can forgive what justice never could, and He can turn to us now with His own set of requirements (see 2 Nephi 2:7; 3 Nephi 9:20).
“So what’s the difference?” the girl asked. “Whether our efforts are required by justice or by Jesus, they are still required.”
“True,” I said, “but they are required for a different purpose. Fulfilling Christ’s requirements is like paying a mortgage instead of rent or like making deposits in a savings account instead of paying off debt. You still have to hand it over every month, but it is for a totally different reason.”
Christ’s Grace Is Sufficient to Transform Us
Christ’s arrangement with us is similar to a mom providing music lessons for her child. Mom pays the piano teacher. How many know what I am talking about? Because Mom pays the debt in full, she can turn to her child and ask for something. What is it? Practice! Does the child’s practice pay the piano teacher? No. Does the child’s practice repay Mom for paying the piano teacher? No. Practicing is how the child shows appreciation for Mom’s incredible gift. It is how he takes advantage of the amazing opportunity Mom is giving him to live his life at a higher level. Mom’s joy is found not in getting repaid but in seeing her gift used—seeing her child improve. And so she continues to call for practice, practice, practice.
If the child sees Mom’s requirement of practice as being too overbearing (“Gosh, Mom, why do I need to practice? None of the other kids have to practice! I’m just going to be a professional baseball player anyway!”), perhaps it is because he doesn’t yet see with mom’s eyes. He doesn’t see how much better his life could be if he would choose to live on a higher plane.
In the same way, because Jesus has paid justice, He can now turn to us and say, “Follow me” (Matthew 4:19), “Keep my commandments” (John 14:15). If we see His requirements as being way too much to ask (“Gosh! None of the other Christians have to pay tithing! None of the other Christians have to go on missions, serve in callings, and do temple work!”), maybe it is because we do not yet see through Christ’s eyes. We have not yet comprehended what He is trying to make of us.
Elder Bruce C. Hafen has written, “The great Mediator asks for our repentance not because we must ‘repay’ him in exchange for his paying our debt to justice, but because repentance initiates a developmental process that, with the Savior’s help, leads us along the path to a saintly character” (The Broken Heart [Salt Lake City: Deseret Book, 1989], 149; emphasis in original).
Elder Dallin H. Oaks has said, referring to President Spencer W. Kimball’s explanation, “The repenting sinner must suffer for his sins, but this suffering has a different purpose than punishment or payment. Its purpose is change” (The Lord’s Way [Salt Lake City: Deseret Book, 1991], 223; emphasis in original). Let’s put that in terms of our analogy: The child must practice the piano, but this practice has a different purpose than punishment or payment. Its purpose is change.
I have born-again Christian friends who say to me, “You Mormons are trying to earn your way to heaven.”
I say, “No, we are not earning heaven. We are learning heaven. We are preparing for it (see D&C 78:7). We are practicing for it.”
They ask me, “Have you been saved by grace?”
I answer, “Yes. Absolutely, totally, completely, thankfully—yes!”
Then I ask them a question that perhaps they have not fully considered: “Have you been changed by grace?” They are so excited about being saved that maybe they are not thinking enough about what comes next. They are so happy the debt is paid that they may not have considered why the debt existed in the first place. Latter-day Saints know not only what Jesus has saved us from but also what He has saved us for. As my friend Brett Sanders puts it, “A life impacted by grace eventually begins to look like Christ’s life.” As my friend Omar Canals puts it, “While many Christians view Christ’s suffering as only a huge favor He did for us, Latter-day Saints also recognize it as a huge investment He made in us.” As Moroni puts it, grace isn’t just about being saved. It is also about becoming like the Savior (see Moroni 7:48).
The miracle of the Atonement is not just that we can live after we die but that we can live more abundantly (see John 10:10). The miracle of the Atonement is not just that we can be cleansed and consoled but that we can be transformed (see Romans 8). Scriptures make it clear that no unclean thing can dwell with God (see Alma 40:26), but, brothers and sisters, no unchanged thing will even want to.
I know a young man who just got out of prison—again. Each time two roads diverge in a yellow wood, he takes the wrong one—every time. When he was a teenager dealing with every bad habit a teenage boy can have, I said to his father, “We need to get him to EFY.” I have worked with that program since 1985. I know the good it can do.
His dad said, “I can’t afford that.”
I said, “I can’t afford it either, but you put some in, and I’ll put some in, and then we’ll go to my mom, because she is a real softy.”
We finally got the kid to EFY, but how long do you think he lasted? Not even a day. By the end of the first day he called his mother and said, “Get me out of here!” Heaven will not be heaven for those who have not chosen to be heavenly.
In the past I had a picture in my mind of what the final judgment would be like, and it went something like this: Jesus standing there with a clipboard and Brad standing on the other side of the room nervously looking at Jesus.
Jesus checks His clipboard and says, “Oh, shoot, Brad. You missed it by two points.”
Brad begs Jesus, “Please, check the essay question one more time! There have to be two points you can squeeze out of that essay.” That’s how I always saw it.
But the older I get, and the more I understand this wonderful plan of redemption, the more I realize that in the final judgment it will not be the unrepentant sinner begging Jesus, “Let me stay.” No, he will probably be saying, “Get me out of here!” Knowing Christ’s character, I believe that if anyone is going to be begging on that occasion, it would probably be Jesus begging the unrepentant sinner, “Please, choose to stay. Please, use my Atonement—not just to be cleansed but to be changed so that you want to stay.”
The miracle of the Atonement is not just that we can go home but that—miraculously—we can feel at home there. If Christ did not require faith and repentance, then there would be no desire to change. Think of your friends and family members who have chosen to live without faith and without repentance. They don’t want to change. They are not trying to abandon sin and become comfortable with God. Rather, they are trying to abandon God and become comfortable with sin. If Jesus did not require covenants and bestow the gift of the Holy Ghost, then there would be no way to change. We would be left forever with only willpower, with no access to His power. If Jesus did not require endurance to the end, then there would be no internalization of those changes over time. They would forever be surface and cosmetic rather than sinking inside us and becoming part of us—part of who we are. Put simply, if Jesus didn’t require practice, then we would never become pianists.
Christ’s Grace Is Sufficient to Help Us
“But Brother Wilcox, don’t you realize how hard it is to practice? I’m just not very good at the piano. I hit a lot of wrong notes. It takes me forever to get it right.” Now wait. Isn’t that all part of the learning process? When a young pianist hits a wrong note, we don’t say he is not worthy to keep practicing. We don’t expect him to be flawless. We just expect him to keep trying. Perfection may be his ultimate goal, but for now we can be content with progress in the right direction. Why is this perspective so easy to see in the context of learning piano but so hard to see in the context of learning heaven?
Too many are giving up on the Church because they are tired of constantly feeling like they are falling short. They have tried in the past, but they always feel like they are just not good enough. They don’t understand grace.
There are young women who know they are daughters of a Heavenly Father who loves them, and they love Him. Then they graduate from high school, and the values they memorized are put to the test. They slip up. They let things go too far, and suddenly they think it is all over. These young women don’t understand grace.
There are young men who grow up their whole lives singing, “I hope they call me on a mission,” and then they do actually grow a foot or two and flake out completely. They get their Eagles, graduate from high school, and go away to college. Then suddenly these young men find out how easy it is to not be trustworthy, loyal, helpful, friendly, courteous, kind, obedient, cheerful, thrifty, brave, clean, or reverent. They mess up. They say, “I’ll never do it again,” and then they do it. They say, “I’ll never do it again,” and then they do it. They say, “This is stupid. I will never do it again.” And then they do it. The guilt is almost unbearable. They don’t dare talk to a bishop. Instead, they hide. They say, “I can’t do this Mormon thing. I’ve tried, and the expectations are just way too high.” So they quit. These young men don’t understand grace.
I know returned missionaries who come home and slip back into bad habits they thought were over. They break promises made before God, angels, and witnesses, and they are convinced there is no hope for them now. They say, “Well, I’ve blown it. There is no use in even trying any more.” Seriously? These young people have spent entire missions teaching people about Jesus Christ and His Atonement, and now they think there is no hope for them? These returned missionaries don’t understand grace.
I know young married couples who find out after the sealing ceremony is over that marriage requires adjustments. The pressures of life mount, and stress starts taking its toll financially, spiritually, and even sexually. Mistakes are made. Walls go up. And pretty soon these husbands and wives are talking with divorce lawyers rather than talking with each other. These couples don’t understand grace.
In all of these cases there should never be just two options: perfection or giving up. When learning the piano, are the only options performing at Carnegie Hall or quitting? No. Growth and development take time. Learning takes time. When we understand grace, we understand that God is long-suffering, that change is a process, and that repentance is a pattern in our lives. When we understand grace, we understand that the blessings of Christ’s Atonement are continuous and His strength is perfect in our weakness (see 2 Corinthians 12:9). When we understand grace, we can, as it says in the Doctrine and Covenants, “continue in patience until [we] are perfected” (D&C 67:13).
One young man wrote me the following e-mail: “I know God has all power, and I know He will help me if I’m worthy, but I’m just never worthy enough to ask for His help. I want Christ’s grace, but I always find myself stuck in the same self-defeating and impossible position: no work, no grace.”
I wrote him back and testified with all my heart that Christ is not waiting at the finish line once we have done “all we can do” (2 Nephi 25:23). He is with us every step of the way.
Elder Bruce C. Hafen has written, “The Savior’s gift of grace to us is not necessarily limited in time to ‘after’ all we can do. We may receive his grace before, during and after the time when we expend our own efforts” (The Broken Heart [Salt Lake City: Deseret Book, 1989], 155). So grace is not a booster engine that kicks in once our fuel supply is exhausted. Rather, it is our constant energy source. It is not the light at the end of the tunnel but the light that moves us through the tunnel. Grace is not achieved somewhere down the road. It is received right here and right now. It is not a finishing touch; it is the Finisher’s touch (see Hebrews 12:2).
In twelve days we celebrate Pioneer Day. The first company of Saints entered the Salt Lake Valley on July 24, 1847. Their journey was difficult and challenging; still, they sang:
Come, come, ye Saints, no toil nor labor fear;
But with joy wend your way.
Though hard to you this journey may appear,
Grace shall be as your day.
[“Come, Come, Ye Saints,” Hymns, 2002, no. 30]
“Grace shall be as your day”—what an interesting phrase. We have all sung it hundreds of times, but have we stopped to consider what it means? “Grace shall be as your day”: grace shall be like a day. As dark as night may become, we can always count on the sun coming up. As dark as our trials, sins, and mistakes may appear, we can always have confidence in the grace of Jesus Christ. Do we earn a sunrise? No. Do we have to be worthy of a chance to begin again? No. We just have to accept these blessings and take advantage of them. As sure as each brand-new day, grace—the enabling power of Jesus Christ—is constant. Faithful pioneers knew they were not alone. The task ahead of them was never as great as the power behind them.
Conclusion
The grace of Christ is sufficient—sufficient to cover our debt, sufficient to transform us, and sufficient to help us as long as that transformation process takes. The Book of Mormon teaches us to rely solely on “the merits, and mercy, and grace of the Holy Messiah” (2 Nephi 2:8). As we do, we do not discover—as some Christians believe—that Christ requires nothing of us. Rather, we discover the reason He requires so much and the strength to do all He asks (see Philippians 4:13). Grace is not the absence of God’s high expectations. Grace is the presence of God’s power (see Luke 1:37).
Elder Neal A. Maxwell once said the following:
Now may I speak . . . to those buffeted by false insecurity, who, though laboring devotedly in the Kingdom, have recurring feelings of falling forever short. . . .
. . . This feeling of inadequacy is . . . normal. There is no way the Church can honestly describe where we must yet go and what we must yet do without creating a sense of immense distance. . . .
. . . This is a gospel of grand expectations, but God’s grace is sufficient for each of us. [CR, October 1976, 14, 16; “Notwithstanding My Weakness,” Ensign, November 1976, 12, 14]
With Elder Maxwell, I testify that God’s grace is sufficient. Jesus’ grace is sufficient. It is enough. It is all we need. Oh, young people, don’t quit. Keep trying. Don’t look for escapes and excuses. Look for the Lord and His perfect strength. Don’t search for someone to blame. Search for someone to help you. Seek Christ, and, as you do, I promise you will feel the enabling power we call His amazing grace. I leave this testimony and all of my love—for I do love you. As God is my witness, I love the youth of this church. I believe in you. I’m pulling for you. And I’m not the only one. Parents are pulling for you, leaders are pulling for you, and prophets are pulling for you. And Jesus is pulling with you. I say this in the name of Jesus Christ, amen.
© Brigham Young University. All rights reserved.
Please take a look and share your thoughts with me.
. http://speeches.byu.edu/?act=viewitem&id=1966
Brad Wilcox was serving as a member of the Sunday School General Board of The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints as well as a BYU associate professor in the Department of Teacher Education in the David O. McKay School of Education when this devotional address was given on 12 July 2011.
I am grateful to be here with my wife, Debi, and my two youngest children—who are currently attending BYU—and several other family members who have come to be with us.
It is an honor to be invited to speak to you today. Several years ago I received an invitation to speak at Women’s Conference. When I told my wife, she asked, “What have they asked you to speak on?”
I was so excited that I got my words mixed up and said, “They want me to speak about changing strengths into weaknesses.”
She thought for a minute and said, “Well, they’ve got the right man for the job!”
She’s correct about that. I could give a whale of a talk on that subject, but I think today I had better go back to the original topic and speak about changing weaknesses into strengths and about how the grace of Jesus Christ is sufficient (see Ether 12:27, D&C 17:8, 2 Corinthians 12:9)—sufficient to cover us, sufficient to transform us, and sufficient to help us as long as that transformation process takes.
Christ’s Grace Is Sufficient to Cover Us
A BYU student once came to me and asked if we could talk. I said, “Of course. How can I help you?”
She said, “I just don’t get grace.”
I responded, “What is it that you don’t understand?”
She said, “I know I need to do my best and then Jesus does the rest, but I can’t even do my best.”
She then went on to tell me all the things she should be doing because she’s a Mormon that she wasn’t doing.
She continued, “I know that I have to do my part and then Jesus makes up the difference and fills the gap that stands between my part and perfection. But who fills the gap that stands between where I am now and my part?”
She then went on to tell me all the things that she shouldn’t be doing because she’s a Mormon, but she was doing them anyway.
Finally I said, “Jesus doesn’t make up the difference. Jesus makes all the difference. Grace is not about filling gaps. It is about filling us.”
Seeing that she was still confused, I took a piece of paper and drew two dots—one at the top representing God and one at the bottom representing us. I then said, “Go ahead. Draw the line. How much is our part? How much is Christ’s part?”
She went right to the center of the page and began to draw a line. Then, considering what we had been speaking about, she went to the bottom of the page and drew a line just above the bottom dot.
I said, “Wrong.”
She said, “I knew it was higher. I should have just drawn it, because I knew it.”
I said, “No. The truth is, there is no line. Jesus filled the whole space. He paid our debt in full. He didn’t pay it all except for a few coins. He paid it all. It is finished.”
She said, “Right! Like I don’t have to do anything?”
“Oh no,” I said, “you have plenty to do, but it is not to fill that gap. We will all be resurrected. We will all go back to God’s presence. What is left to be determined by our obedience is what kind of body we plan on being resurrected with and how comfortable we plan to be in God’s presence and how long we plan to stay there.”
Christ asks us to show faith in Him, repent, make and keep covenants, receive the Holy Ghost, and endure to the end. By complying, we are not paying the demands of justice—not even the smallest part. Instead, we are showing appreciation for what Jesus Christ did by using it to live a life like His. Justice requires immediate perfection or a punishment when we fall short. Because Jesus took that punishment, He can offer us the chance for ultimate perfection (see Matthew 5:48, 3 Nephi 12:48) and help us reach that goal. He can forgive what justice never could, and He can turn to us now with His own set of requirements (see 2 Nephi 2:7; 3 Nephi 9:20).
“So what’s the difference?” the girl asked. “Whether our efforts are required by justice or by Jesus, they are still required.”
“True,” I said, “but they are required for a different purpose. Fulfilling Christ’s requirements is like paying a mortgage instead of rent or like making deposits in a savings account instead of paying off debt. You still have to hand it over every month, but it is for a totally different reason.”
Christ’s Grace Is Sufficient to Transform Us
Christ’s arrangement with us is similar to a mom providing music lessons for her child. Mom pays the piano teacher. How many know what I am talking about? Because Mom pays the debt in full, she can turn to her child and ask for something. What is it? Practice! Does the child’s practice pay the piano teacher? No. Does the child’s practice repay Mom for paying the piano teacher? No. Practicing is how the child shows appreciation for Mom’s incredible gift. It is how he takes advantage of the amazing opportunity Mom is giving him to live his life at a higher level. Mom’s joy is found not in getting repaid but in seeing her gift used—seeing her child improve. And so she continues to call for practice, practice, practice.
If the child sees Mom’s requirement of practice as being too overbearing (“Gosh, Mom, why do I need to practice? None of the other kids have to practice! I’m just going to be a professional baseball player anyway!”), perhaps it is because he doesn’t yet see with mom’s eyes. He doesn’t see how much better his life could be if he would choose to live on a higher plane.
In the same way, because Jesus has paid justice, He can now turn to us and say, “Follow me” (Matthew 4:19), “Keep my commandments” (John 14:15). If we see His requirements as being way too much to ask (“Gosh! None of the other Christians have to pay tithing! None of the other Christians have to go on missions, serve in callings, and do temple work!”), maybe it is because we do not yet see through Christ’s eyes. We have not yet comprehended what He is trying to make of us.
Elder Bruce C. Hafen has written, “The great Mediator asks for our repentance not because we must ‘repay’ him in exchange for his paying our debt to justice, but because repentance initiates a developmental process that, with the Savior’s help, leads us along the path to a saintly character” (The Broken Heart [Salt Lake City: Deseret Book, 1989], 149; emphasis in original).
Elder Dallin H. Oaks has said, referring to President Spencer W. Kimball’s explanation, “The repenting sinner must suffer for his sins, but this suffering has a different purpose than punishment or payment. Its purpose is change” (The Lord’s Way [Salt Lake City: Deseret Book, 1991], 223; emphasis in original). Let’s put that in terms of our analogy: The child must practice the piano, but this practice has a different purpose than punishment or payment. Its purpose is change.
I have born-again Christian friends who say to me, “You Mormons are trying to earn your way to heaven.”
I say, “No, we are not earning heaven. We are learning heaven. We are preparing for it (see D&C 78:7). We are practicing for it.”
They ask me, “Have you been saved by grace?”
I answer, “Yes. Absolutely, totally, completely, thankfully—yes!”
Then I ask them a question that perhaps they have not fully considered: “Have you been changed by grace?” They are so excited about being saved that maybe they are not thinking enough about what comes next. They are so happy the debt is paid that they may not have considered why the debt existed in the first place. Latter-day Saints know not only what Jesus has saved us from but also what He has saved us for. As my friend Brett Sanders puts it, “A life impacted by grace eventually begins to look like Christ’s life.” As my friend Omar Canals puts it, “While many Christians view Christ’s suffering as only a huge favor He did for us, Latter-day Saints also recognize it as a huge investment He made in us.” As Moroni puts it, grace isn’t just about being saved. It is also about becoming like the Savior (see Moroni 7:48).
The miracle of the Atonement is not just that we can live after we die but that we can live more abundantly (see John 10:10). The miracle of the Atonement is not just that we can be cleansed and consoled but that we can be transformed (see Romans 8). Scriptures make it clear that no unclean thing can dwell with God (see Alma 40:26), but, brothers and sisters, no unchanged thing will even want to.
I know a young man who just got out of prison—again. Each time two roads diverge in a yellow wood, he takes the wrong one—every time. When he was a teenager dealing with every bad habit a teenage boy can have, I said to his father, “We need to get him to EFY.” I have worked with that program since 1985. I know the good it can do.
His dad said, “I can’t afford that.”
I said, “I can’t afford it either, but you put some in, and I’ll put some in, and then we’ll go to my mom, because she is a real softy.”
We finally got the kid to EFY, but how long do you think he lasted? Not even a day. By the end of the first day he called his mother and said, “Get me out of here!” Heaven will not be heaven for those who have not chosen to be heavenly.
In the past I had a picture in my mind of what the final judgment would be like, and it went something like this: Jesus standing there with a clipboard and Brad standing on the other side of the room nervously looking at Jesus.
Jesus checks His clipboard and says, “Oh, shoot, Brad. You missed it by two points.”
Brad begs Jesus, “Please, check the essay question one more time! There have to be two points you can squeeze out of that essay.” That’s how I always saw it.
But the older I get, and the more I understand this wonderful plan of redemption, the more I realize that in the final judgment it will not be the unrepentant sinner begging Jesus, “Let me stay.” No, he will probably be saying, “Get me out of here!” Knowing Christ’s character, I believe that if anyone is going to be begging on that occasion, it would probably be Jesus begging the unrepentant sinner, “Please, choose to stay. Please, use my Atonement—not just to be cleansed but to be changed so that you want to stay.”
The miracle of the Atonement is not just that we can go home but that—miraculously—we can feel at home there. If Christ did not require faith and repentance, then there would be no desire to change. Think of your friends and family members who have chosen to live without faith and without repentance. They don’t want to change. They are not trying to abandon sin and become comfortable with God. Rather, they are trying to abandon God and become comfortable with sin. If Jesus did not require covenants and bestow the gift of the Holy Ghost, then there would be no way to change. We would be left forever with only willpower, with no access to His power. If Jesus did not require endurance to the end, then there would be no internalization of those changes over time. They would forever be surface and cosmetic rather than sinking inside us and becoming part of us—part of who we are. Put simply, if Jesus didn’t require practice, then we would never become pianists.
Christ’s Grace Is Sufficient to Help Us
“But Brother Wilcox, don’t you realize how hard it is to practice? I’m just not very good at the piano. I hit a lot of wrong notes. It takes me forever to get it right.” Now wait. Isn’t that all part of the learning process? When a young pianist hits a wrong note, we don’t say he is not worthy to keep practicing. We don’t expect him to be flawless. We just expect him to keep trying. Perfection may be his ultimate goal, but for now we can be content with progress in the right direction. Why is this perspective so easy to see in the context of learning piano but so hard to see in the context of learning heaven?
Too many are giving up on the Church because they are tired of constantly feeling like they are falling short. They have tried in the past, but they always feel like they are just not good enough. They don’t understand grace.
There are young women who know they are daughters of a Heavenly Father who loves them, and they love Him. Then they graduate from high school, and the values they memorized are put to the test. They slip up. They let things go too far, and suddenly they think it is all over. These young women don’t understand grace.
There are young men who grow up their whole lives singing, “I hope they call me on a mission,” and then they do actually grow a foot or two and flake out completely. They get their Eagles, graduate from high school, and go away to college. Then suddenly these young men find out how easy it is to not be trustworthy, loyal, helpful, friendly, courteous, kind, obedient, cheerful, thrifty, brave, clean, or reverent. They mess up. They say, “I’ll never do it again,” and then they do it. They say, “I’ll never do it again,” and then they do it. They say, “This is stupid. I will never do it again.” And then they do it. The guilt is almost unbearable. They don’t dare talk to a bishop. Instead, they hide. They say, “I can’t do this Mormon thing. I’ve tried, and the expectations are just way too high.” So they quit. These young men don’t understand grace.
I know returned missionaries who come home and slip back into bad habits they thought were over. They break promises made before God, angels, and witnesses, and they are convinced there is no hope for them now. They say, “Well, I’ve blown it. There is no use in even trying any more.” Seriously? These young people have spent entire missions teaching people about Jesus Christ and His Atonement, and now they think there is no hope for them? These returned missionaries don’t understand grace.
I know young married couples who find out after the sealing ceremony is over that marriage requires adjustments. The pressures of life mount, and stress starts taking its toll financially, spiritually, and even sexually. Mistakes are made. Walls go up. And pretty soon these husbands and wives are talking with divorce lawyers rather than talking with each other. These couples don’t understand grace.
In all of these cases there should never be just two options: perfection or giving up. When learning the piano, are the only options performing at Carnegie Hall or quitting? No. Growth and development take time. Learning takes time. When we understand grace, we understand that God is long-suffering, that change is a process, and that repentance is a pattern in our lives. When we understand grace, we understand that the blessings of Christ’s Atonement are continuous and His strength is perfect in our weakness (see 2 Corinthians 12:9). When we understand grace, we can, as it says in the Doctrine and Covenants, “continue in patience until [we] are perfected” (D&C 67:13).
One young man wrote me the following e-mail: “I know God has all power, and I know He will help me if I’m worthy, but I’m just never worthy enough to ask for His help. I want Christ’s grace, but I always find myself stuck in the same self-defeating and impossible position: no work, no grace.”
I wrote him back and testified with all my heart that Christ is not waiting at the finish line once we have done “all we can do” (2 Nephi 25:23). He is with us every step of the way.
Elder Bruce C. Hafen has written, “The Savior’s gift of grace to us is not necessarily limited in time to ‘after’ all we can do. We may receive his grace before, during and after the time when we expend our own efforts” (The Broken Heart [Salt Lake City: Deseret Book, 1989], 155). So grace is not a booster engine that kicks in once our fuel supply is exhausted. Rather, it is our constant energy source. It is not the light at the end of the tunnel but the light that moves us through the tunnel. Grace is not achieved somewhere down the road. It is received right here and right now. It is not a finishing touch; it is the Finisher’s touch (see Hebrews 12:2).
In twelve days we celebrate Pioneer Day. The first company of Saints entered the Salt Lake Valley on July 24, 1847. Their journey was difficult and challenging; still, they sang:
Come, come, ye Saints, no toil nor labor fear;
But with joy wend your way.
Though hard to you this journey may appear,
Grace shall be as your day.
[“Come, Come, Ye Saints,” Hymns, 2002, no. 30]
“Grace shall be as your day”—what an interesting phrase. We have all sung it hundreds of times, but have we stopped to consider what it means? “Grace shall be as your day”: grace shall be like a day. As dark as night may become, we can always count on the sun coming up. As dark as our trials, sins, and mistakes may appear, we can always have confidence in the grace of Jesus Christ. Do we earn a sunrise? No. Do we have to be worthy of a chance to begin again? No. We just have to accept these blessings and take advantage of them. As sure as each brand-new day, grace—the enabling power of Jesus Christ—is constant. Faithful pioneers knew they were not alone. The task ahead of them was never as great as the power behind them.
Conclusion
The grace of Christ is sufficient—sufficient to cover our debt, sufficient to transform us, and sufficient to help us as long as that transformation process takes. The Book of Mormon teaches us to rely solely on “the merits, and mercy, and grace of the Holy Messiah” (2 Nephi 2:8). As we do, we do not discover—as some Christians believe—that Christ requires nothing of us. Rather, we discover the reason He requires so much and the strength to do all He asks (see Philippians 4:13). Grace is not the absence of God’s high expectations. Grace is the presence of God’s power (see Luke 1:37).
Elder Neal A. Maxwell once said the following:
Now may I speak . . . to those buffeted by false insecurity, who, though laboring devotedly in the Kingdom, have recurring feelings of falling forever short. . . .
. . . This feeling of inadequacy is . . . normal. There is no way the Church can honestly describe where we must yet go and what we must yet do without creating a sense of immense distance. . . .
. . . This is a gospel of grand expectations, but God’s grace is sufficient for each of us. [CR, October 1976, 14, 16; “Notwithstanding My Weakness,” Ensign, November 1976, 12, 14]
With Elder Maxwell, I testify that God’s grace is sufficient. Jesus’ grace is sufficient. It is enough. It is all we need. Oh, young people, don’t quit. Keep trying. Don’t look for escapes and excuses. Look for the Lord and His perfect strength. Don’t search for someone to blame. Search for someone to help you. Seek Christ, and, as you do, I promise you will feel the enabling power we call His amazing grace. I leave this testimony and all of my love—for I do love you. As God is my witness, I love the youth of this church. I believe in you. I’m pulling for you. And I’m not the only one. Parents are pulling for you, leaders are pulling for you, and prophets are pulling for you. And Jesus is pulling with you. I say this in the name of Jesus Christ, amen.
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Please take a look and share your thoughts with me.
Saturday, September 27, 2014
Under Construction
We are doing some renovations in our new home. Lex wanted to be an architect when she was growing up and can see rooms with potential and more importantly the steps to get them there. So we took the walls surrounding our stairs to half walls all the way around, It looks great, but is taking a bit longer than expected,
I have to keep reminding myself that I am a work in progress with my rehab. I watched part of PBS' documentary on FDR and liked something he said during one of his speeches during World War II, "We will have some loses before the victory."
The life lesson for me is that as I progress, There are more than two options of perfection or just giving up. In this months Ensign there is an article titled "Savor Every Moment In Life" where the author talks about her personal experience of not getting married when she thought she was going to. She recalls hearing a BYU devotional from Elder Jefferey R. Holland and his wife, who said, to not “march to an arbitrary drummer who seems to be beating a frenzied cadence to the passing years”1 and to trust in the timing of the Lord.
I have to keep reminding myself that I am a work in progress with my rehab. I watched part of PBS' documentary on FDR and liked something he said during one of his speeches during World War II, "We will have some loses before the victory."
The life lesson for me is that as I progress, There are more than two options of perfection or just giving up. In this months Ensign there is an article titled "Savor Every Moment In Life" where the author talks about her personal experience of not getting married when she thought she was going to. She recalls hearing a BYU devotional from Elder Jefferey R. Holland and his wife, who said, to not “march to an arbitrary drummer who seems to be beating a frenzied cadence to the passing years”1 and to trust in the timing of the Lord.
Tuesday, September 16, 2014
Is this me or the TBI?
Four years and counting I am still asking Lex this at least once a week. Welcome to the new normal, Curtis. It is mostly a lighthearted joke about something that I am constantly doing that annoys her. Like telling her that I am exhausted from worrying about worrying, which is just me and not the TBI.
In my reading of 'The Compound Effect,' It talks about the need of taking responsibility for 100% of any relstionship that you're in and not the often thought 50/50 response. I am waking up to the fact that I need to do this with myself and give my all instead of just writing myself off as just because of the TBI caused neglect. . .
In my reading of 'The Compound Effect,' It talks about the need of taking responsibility for 100% of any relstionship that you're in and not the often thought 50/50 response. I am waking up to the fact that I need to do this with myself and give my all instead of just writing myself off as just because of the TBI caused neglect. . .
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