-'Ragtime' I asked my twin brother, if I was alone in thinking that I was just a spoiled rich kid, he confirmed that he had felt that way, "Only all the time." I wonder what the use is of demeaning myself all the time? Life is hard enough without me trying to beat myself up, a funny mental picture, of me laying on the ground trying to do just that, provides some much needed comic relief. especially with this self-pity post that I've been sitting on and revising for over 6 months now.
This is an intimacy post or as I have learned first from Dr. Jeff Robinson and the from Candeo is more accurately written as "in to me see."If I want to be intimate with others, they need to know who I am.
I am the prodigal son, finally and continually "Coming to myself" and making my way back. I know that true repentance is not found in only the steps, but in the turning towards our Heavenly Father. Having a change of heart, takes "changing it one fiber at a time," another life lesson from my Pa.I also heard a friend in my ward Ryan VanOrden say that, "repentance is really just homesickness for our Heavenly Home." I like that and think that I often give repentance a bad rep, when in reality it is the only way that we are able to progress.
"Where much is given, much is required.(D&C 82:3)" I best get my act together and get giving.
The pink elephant in the room is that I was excommunicated and now am on the road back. Rebaptized a few years ago and working on full restoration of blessings. Not that anyone needed to know, but my life continues to teach me that it is not about what you have, but what you give. In the words of Jack Rushton in his book, It's great to be Alive, "Life is for giving."
I was able to sit and chat with my grandma Baugh the other day, she made it seem like I was doing her a favor by listening to her stories, but it was her doing me the favor in taking the time to share and teach me. She spoke of what a wonderful wife I have and how she was impressed by Lexy's blog writing around the time of the accident because of how she was able to gratefully accept help from others. She told me a story that was shared in her ward of a boy that was born crippled, both mentally as well as physically that wanted to play baseball, his parents signed him up and he played, never hitting a ball or running to a base. It was the championship game and his team was down one, with a runner on second when he got up to bat. The coach of the other team went out to the pitchers mound to tell his pitcher that this was a done deal, an easy out. The boy pitcher took a long look at the ball, and another. He tossed it underhanded as this boy at bat swung, but did not hit the ball.The pitcher got the ball again and studied it longer this time before he tossed it again, this time the boy hit the ball only a few inches from where he stood. The catcher picked up the baseball and studied it as well before throwing it well out of the first baseman's reach.
Tieing this back to the title, With our visit with Kirin, we touched on parenting our kids and the fine line between giving them the best opportunities that we are able to and not getting them trapped into feelings of entitlement, something about raising parents. It's annoying when people quote themself, eh?
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